I’ve been having a hard time slogging through the trauma of the American election, with the attendant social media hazards that come along with politics. I couldn’t sleep tonight, so I wrote this fictional post to baby boomers who supported the male candidate:
Baby boomers, has the church let you down? Do you see through their bigotry and sexism, but still need a place to project your un-owned psychic material that you don’t want to take responsibility for? Consider: the Church of CONSPIRACY THEORIES! Here at the Church of Conspiracy Theories, you can take all the things you hate about yourself and project them into people you don’t like, thus allowing you to identify with only the parts of yourself that you do like, like your defensive sentimentalization, your frantic positivity, or your intellect that can’t connect to your heart. Disavow all the stuff that’s too hard to integrate, and use it to create monsters out of educated people while you get to look like a sad and helpless political victim.
You deserve to feel great and not have to do any self-awareness work where you deal with your shadow material because that’s just gross. We get it- personal inner work is hard, newspaper subscriptions are expensive and you’re too old to hang out with the kids at university. In fact, at your age, you qualify for reduced tuition for seniors, but why wreck your brain on homework when you can just make your own reality up for free? We don’t stand on the shoulders of giants of those who come before us, because anyone who is a giant probably had an agenda, so we stand on the ground, and that’s where underdogs stand. Being on the ground means you’re an underdog, and calling yourself an underdog feels virtuous, and we know you’re scrambling to feel a sense of superiority before you die.
Originally forged out of the personal hell of Enneagram type Sixes before all this political turmoil started, today, we have opened our doors to every personality type. Our defence mechanism, projection, is open to anyone who wants to experience our bespoke form of escapism.
Do you have trouble knowing who to trust? The church of conspiracy theories tells you not to trust educated people, making us one of the most trustworthy institutions in the world.
Are you a man who struggles to create loving bonds with women? We are too, and our sacred literature is full of stories of women who are secretly witches trying to ruin the institution of marriage behind your back. Anything can be true when you project!
If it’s comforting and not true, it can be true for you. Feel confident taking quotes out of context for the first time since high school. Correct scientists, and take every institution you feel disconnected from and put air quotes around it to elevate yourself in relation to it. Sneer at things your more successful friends believe with conviction, knowing that you belong to a Church that supports you.
We don’t do anything about normal corruption because that’s too easy. We take regular corruption and turn it into a fantasy tale of mythic proportions with demons and people eating babies so nothing actually gets done about it and we can masturbate to our fears of being controlled by corruption.
Projection makes can make any ego lie true, and your self-serving feelings about your life are more important than “reality”. Get the official stamp of victimhood today!